Tags: musings


"I am the Princess of Wales... Will you speak with a woman?"

In his love notes, Mirmo advised 'Wallflower' to let her crush in on her secret. Or else her crush will never know.

Mirmo, I've been there. Haven't done that exactly, but when the crush finds out about the crush, they avoid you. And it's painful, losing the halfway (easy acquaintance) you have because you wanted (have been fantasizing) all-the-way (girlfriend/boyfriend). It isn't like with Ron Weasley, who snapped up Lavender Brown because of her obviousness.

So how do I write this kind of scenario/dilemma? The brave and decent male (who will ask you if it's true you have a crush on him and then tell you 'sorry' because he can't reciprocate, but remain friends) seems too good to be true.

I did say 'painful' and 'dilemma'. Add 'trauma'.

I hope my mom finds that book I told her about. For my speculative writing aspirations. Witches galore.

Ignore my ugly arrow. Look at that one munching cereal beside Ron. Alex Watson, Emma's brother.

He's... (alright, I'll say it!) cute.

Wow, Joanna changed her userpic!

"The novel is an art form and when you use it for anything other than art, you pervert it... If you manage to use it successfully for social, religious, or other purposes, it is because you make it art first."

~Flannery O' Connor


Talk about going off on a tangled tangent: hair, teeth, and then fandom and 'shipping musings

Either I'm learning to comb and brush it right, or my hair is not as bushy as before.

Being round-faced with thick hair, I could only have one ideal hairstyle: never voluminous on the sides and never flat at the crown and temples.

From the moment I lost baby-ness, around age twelve, my hair has been layered very short, never going past my nape. The cut reminds me of the bouffant of Anne Shirley's and Edward Cullen's era. And it's rather matronly. I grew tired of it and grew my hair out. High maintenance. Trimming needed every four weeks. When it's high time for another layering, I avoid turning sideways at mirrors. My hair billows at the back like something's living in it.

Now it doesn't any longer. It's flat on the back now. Fly-away, because the shortest layer is already at the bend of my nape, but quite docile and non-Einstein-ish. The curves of the layers that should have been giving fullness to my temples but are now at my ears, I just comb back. I've been due at the neighborhood hairdresser two months ago. I've had no need to go.

Well, I haven't gone out either. Nothing major, just Sherly and family (which is one and the same thing, hehe, love you, She).

It doesn't make sense anyway that I have hair like I do. My dad's is curly, even kinky, and my mom's is straight and wispy, the kind that needs curling or blow-drying to be volumized. Unless, like mine, Mom's hair also gave up being a pain at age twenty-one.

I don't know about Dad. None of us inherited his hair and except to brag about being MVP in the basketball varsity and his exploits of exhorting money from neighbors who watched tv from my lola's balcony (in those old days when tv owners were few), he doesn't answer questions pertaining to his younger days.

Because I always end up asking when he first lost a tooth.

He's equipped with two jaws of false teeth already. He's only fifty.

I have never had so much as a toothache. Maybe my feasting on gristle has something to do with it. I like crunching those white bones especially when people will hear. My habitus disgustica.

But speaking of hair, I posted something about it on lion_lamb (♥). Bella and Hermione both have brown hair. And brown eyes. That's what started it, and it went on and on like a butterfly kiss gone bad--good.

I don't know how many of you on my f-list are members/watchers of lion_lamb aside from my dear twinses and Preethi (and of course, Cynthia, new friend, mod! ^_^). Mind boggling. 100 comments in only a little over 24 hours. I've never had so much attention on something I posted, either on forums or at the MNFF archive.

But I'm being vain. It's Bella and Hermione and Hermione's ships that's to thank for the many replies. *giggles* *can't stop*

I've pretty much stuck to Mugglenet and its strictly moderated Fan Fiction Beta Boards since my very first HP fangirl day, so it's only now that the ship wars struck me.

That people are so passionate about their ship that they are close-minded and derogatory of the rival ship has been a 'whoa!' moment last night.

I've never felt that way myself. Probably because I've read not just the books and the canon-devotee fics, but also good ones that sailed non-canon pairings.

Non-canon pairings I fancied, that is. But what's the bet that I'll be converted if I read-- e.g., SS/HG fics, too?

Yes, the reason I'm not a SS/HG shipper is because I haven't read SS/HG stories. That's the only way you can remain close-minded to a ship, methinks.

See, that people are so passionate about their ship that they can use the subtlest and most infinitesimal stuff in canon as masts is proven and amazing. Annoyingly commendable. Gods. Creativity at its most devious. And when they convincingly create their own canon, it's double the 'flabbergastment' *says me, being weaned into an older generation/younger generation pairing*

Canon aside, book characters are people.

And as in the real world's people, attraction between any man and woman, whatever age, belief or background, is rarely impossible. Just toss them repeatedly together. Like two flints, sparks will fly.

The 'that can't happen' is only on your mind, Watson.


Happy birthday, Delaney!

Happy birthday, Emerita!

Belated online greeting, brother bear! (Like you read this) :P

Crispy brownouts... and uh, wow...

That's what we call electricity interruptions; even the news use it.

Very Filipino, I think. ^_^

Frank wasn't very furious with us in Marilao, Bulacan-- at least our part of Marilao. There had only been the brownouts, but we were snug from the storm in our house, thank the Lord, and I was still able to submit my review requirements for SPEW, and get the fan fiction updates without the monitor of the pc blacking out on me. Timing was everything.

Sore luck that when I wanted to post, the signal was weak.

We had a nice time Sunday night; it made me wish the electricity would stay out. My sibs and I played cards on the living room floor while our Mom stretched out on the sofa with Jouie's phone and earphones. She must have liked watching us; she gave us cookies-- and normally, you have to know where the jar's hidden to get some.

Either the soup we had for dinner (lots of onions) or the cookies or the darkness did the trick: my body clock is back to normality's normal.

Monday morning, the appliances were juiced again, but froze right again after letting me post my SPEW reviews.

It's so funny that when the rain's sheeting, there are classes, and when they suspend the classes, the sun is shining... It shone Monday morning. If it weren't for the wind, we would have played badmintion, Josh, Jouie and I. Instead, we continued the Lucky Nine tournament of the night before. And since Mom discovered Josh's homework, he was banned and became our bakemono (monster) instead. A la Takeshi's Castle, only, he doesn't grab either of us until one of us lose. If Jouie and I draw equal cards, we tackle the bakemono.

Quality family moments. It made me anti-technology again. I really envy those who lived in centuries past, without cars, without t.v's... we whould have stopped at the telephone (we can sorta blog there, too, see Anne of Avonlea) and should have been content with horses.

Jouie: But it will be hot without electricity. No aircon or fans.
Me: It only became hot because of global warming, and you know what caused global warming.
Jouie: Ah.


Jouie showed me her notebook for computer class. Guess who's teaching them. (Ref: my "About AARGH!" post)


Pooh, pooh, pooh!

This week's highlights:

~Mandarin blouse caught Mr Sacristan's attention. Or maybe it was my Divine Mercy cardboard fan.
~MTV's Twilight Tuesday. "I had an adrenaline rush. They're fairly common. Google it."
~Twilight fan fics. I thought I could do without them. Really, I did. Like I thought I could do without an up-to-date mobile phone. They add spice and beauty to living. Hmm hmm.
~"The three degrees of abtstraction and the causal analysis of human cognition."
I'm not studying philosophy, Sherly does. I only helped her research. Isn't that a mouthful? No wonder doctors are almost always pompous. I miss Sophie's World now.
~Knowing Dad's homecoming date: July 11th.
~The announcement about the 3rd Philippine Graphic Fiction Awards. And there's Short Film cat now. It's getting more and more prestigious, more and more out of reach... I just want to place so I can meet and greet and pose with Neil Gaiman >.>
~Not so empty-handed anymore for Haunted Legends open call. See song, which is among my faves:

Lyrics | 25 Minutes Too Late lyrics


~Ate three apples, three siopao's last night. Still suffering.
~People aware of being bitches, but not of being bores. Hehe. Not suffering at all. Dismissal as usual.
~Body clock still dysfunctional. Went to sleep at 8:50 this morning and woke up at 4 pm in time for Avatar. Tsk. And Dad's coming home in July. I'll be busted if I don't fix le body clock. *adds Dad coming home to highlights*

~ * ~

Spent the night gathering quotes on writing and writers from Encarta. Laughed a lot. Was confused a lot. Was scared a lot. This is why one must never ask for advice.

*face scrunch*

Let's say Stephenie Meyer is a fan fictionist and she makes me her beta.

I don't think I'll find much to criticize.

I'm at home in her world.

I won't notice the 'tritenesses'. In defense of Edward, he's very much still influenced by the early twentieth century, its courtesies and chivalries. Can't the critics see that?

So they don't like it. To each her own, quoth Bella.


Two, three or four days ago before my brothers commandeered the pc for last-minute RPG before school, I tried to find these sites where you can download free PDF versions of copyrighted books. I might have missed including a magic word in the search box. The hits just showed blogs and blogs and blogs mentioning Meyer and her work.

One belongs to a writer whose book is only published online. Her entry made me wonder whether critics are just or just jealous.

It's what inspired this post in my dear diary.

In the rare occasions when popular writers are also 'good' writers, it's not their creativity in stringing together the rules of grammar that made them popular. It's their story. Readers don't buy books for the language. They buy and love books that immerse them in a good story.

Note to self: it's the story that matters. Never mind the brook or the birdsong.

Look at Stevie, he's still banned from libraries, but he IS King.

When the happy day comes that I publish my own book, I'll face these two monoliths as well. Critical acclaim. Popularity.

I'll either climb one, or be pummeled by one.

Hence, the face scrunch.


My little brother Josh was circumcised last Friday. I don't know where the tradition stemmed, really, and I'd rather be mystified all my life, but it's some sort of initiation or baptism into manhood here in my country. Boys ranging from ages nine to sixteen (!) troop to doctors during summer for this.

We had a rip-roaring time last night when I questioned Josh and Oncci about it. I even opened our medical book and asked them to point out what is removed. Oncci crowed that the illustration of the penis there is 'supot', a Filipino slang I won't be able to translate. Oh, gad.

Oncci said the doctor makes a slit on either side of the foreskin and then folds the foreskin back... Eew. So how does that heal? Like a scar?

They just laughed my curiosity off. One day, I'll know. Hmm, hmm.

Anyway, I'm realizing just how dependable (hen-pecked) Josh is. Since he was incapacitated (yeah, he is), I had to feed the dogs, unchain and chain the gate, buy my own snacks, get juice/iced tea myself, walk to the fridge to get food and to the center table to get the remote myself...

But then he says he'll make it up to me when he's healed, because I also hang up the crotch of his shorts/jammies on a needle and thread on our spare upper bunk when we go to bed.

I can't wait til he's healed so we can go biking again.

Right now, I relish teasing the way he walks. Like a duck.

It's not about being tough... dismissal, rather.

"What others say or think or do is part of their lives, not ours. When we let go of the things that don't belong to us, we will find our own treasures."
-Joan Walsh Anglund

Quite the bombshell for serenity. Especially for someone who gets ignored, belittled, backstabbed, snobbed (insert all synonyms/variants of being ill-treated here), etc.

I have experienced/am experiencing one or the other of the synonyms... The world is full of all sorts of characters, after all, not just the nice ones--although I'm lucky to be surrounded by the nice ones, too. But really, it's true nothing can hurt you unless you let it.



That's what I get for not checking my friends page before posting. Funny to discover you'd reposted the same thing another friend did (Haunted Legends' call for submissions). ^_^

Of corsages, dog-petting and farts...

I nearly always compose LJ posts in my mind before I fall asleep, but they don't get posted. I check my email, check my fave fics and then I'm pestered away from the pc by Barbie dress-up addicts and Pokemon addicts and StarCraft addicts and email novelists.

Maundy Thursday and Good Friday, it was my maternal family's turn to get together. Here at our house. It was quiet. My favorite niece (incidentally, we call our cousins' children niece or nephew. In US and UK, it seems they are cousins, too, no?) has reached the hibernation phase in her teen years. All she did is sleep.

All I did was wash dishes.

Well, not really, but they seemed that many.

Indian mangoes plus cousins plus hammock equals pleasure.

Oh, Easter, we went to Salubong (meet) as usual. It's a reenactment of Mary seeing the resurrected Jesus, with angels plucking off her mourning veil. The dawn was something divine then. The rest of the day, I slept.

If I've posted earlier, I would have elaborated and holy-fied this entry, too... hehe.

I've reread Rebecca, which led me to read The Castle of Otranto. I've downloaded it from Project Gutenberg. Between that and Coelho's The Pilgrimage (my trouble is I visualise Coelho's simple description too much), I'm having trouble sleeping. Not that this is news.

My original fiction is going well, if being run over by the usual midstream trout-jump of doubts is 'going well'. Maybe one has to be a prodigy or over thirty to ignore or solve plot holes/pseudo holes. /le sigh

Of course, in the Neil Gaiman's letter from Nano, he says he goes through the same every time, too-- mustn't rant.

Actually, I'm posting to record my brother's classification of farts. I drank a lot of soda while shooting Josh's graduation, so farts figured into conversation, prompting Onchie to kick and punch me, along with Mom, Josh and Jouie.

>>>Meaty: the kind you hear. Non-meaty: the kind you smell.

I prefer meaty. At least, when among family and close friends. It makes the heat and the headache go away because you laugh.

Jouie is first in her class and is Best in Science. She's more like Onchie than me.

Josh is Drummer of the Year and Boy Scout of the Year. He's also seventh in his class. Between sneezing 30x/minute (due to pollen from the flowers and dust from the drapes and decorations), I captured Mom and the teachers laughing over Josh's ribbon-less Boy Scout of the Year medal. And that was not enough, Josh also had to crack his best friend's forehead open...

They were playing and kidding around at the grad party. How that led to rock-throwing I can only imagine.

After Mom and Josh went home from the clinic, we all talked about our childhood blunders. I had nearly none except that one when I busted my lip from tripping on a pipe and falling on my face. I still have the scar.

When he was about two, Josh chased his toy helicopter and dived into the living room dresser. His perfect little milk teeth weren't perfect from then on.

Onchie was bitten by a neighbor's dog when he was about four. I remember this one because my aunt went nuts when she discovered the bite hours later. Because Onchie kept his hand pocketed.

It's only now that I asked why Aling Virgie's dog (which was like Jego, hairy and cute) bit him. He said he was petting it, and it was licking his hand. And then he put a rock in its mouth.

In third grade, Onchie was run over by basketball players. He can't remember why they rampaged to him or why he was in their way. I laughed so much imagining him being bulldozed like that.

And He said, "Cast your burdens upon me, those who are heavily laden..."

Semana Santa.

Last Palm Sunday, we went to the annual reunion during the last day of our lolas' (our grandma and her sisters) Pabasa (reading). It's a Hispanic tradtion of singing the Passion of the Christ (not the movie). There were fewer cousins present. Grad rehearsals, work, pregnancies, new marriages, etc.

Jonie (my singing star of a cousin, hehe) was there with her two-year girlfriend, Sheri Mae. We just packed ourselves into Jonie's room as usual to escape the heat, us cousins, and watched Alvin and the Chipmunks and Jonie and Smay. They're sweet.

For goodness's sake, Jonie is a year younger than me. It should be me all lovey-dovey with someone. /grumble&grin

I have to go back to ma laptop. I'll quote my post in SPEW as a shortcut:

"Aww, so the archive is back! Yay.

I lost all those who have favorited me. I've got only one now. There used to be "82". Obviously, that's one of the infos lost along with whether you are a beta or not...etc. I tried to edit it, but got this white error page. The lack of our gorgeous formatting also betrays the archive's convalescent mode. I'm sure it will come back soonest.

I love the way the summary shows up when you click on the story. It used to be just the chapter list or the story itself if it's a one-shot. Now it's better, no? The reviews page, me likey very mucho.

It's Semana Santa over here. Holy Week. People are flocking to bus stations, ports and airports. The holiday's an excuse to get together with family, but me and mine, we don't think it's proper to gallivant to beaches while we comemmorate the Passion of the Christ.../opine

Bye, Joo-lee-yaah! Jen, it's just you and me. *clings* Oh, and I have something for you and all other SPEWly vegetarians: If your blood type is O or B, you should eat 80% meat, 20% vegetables. For type A, it's vice versa. For type AB, its fifty-fifty. Apparently, this recent research found out that not eating according to your blood type leads to all sorts of malfunctions, e.g, cancer, diabetes, etc. Take it with a pinch of salt. I forgot where I read it and I haven't bookmarked the page. My blood-type is O.

The food pyramid is apparently old-school? Science.

Speaking of, my newsletter from Writer's Digest came up with a timely article on The Religion Wars. There are these two books in the UK and the US, The God Delusion and The Dawkins Delusion, duking it out over the existence of God. *scrunches nose*

On Good Friday at 3pm, I'll start my annual novena to the Divine Mercy. It'll be my sixth year doing it!

Sheesh, another LJ-long post. But I'm making up for my lurkiness, SPEW. /huggles

PS: Yes, my Turbo-Spero is like new! All keys obedient.

PPS: I love tofu, deep-fried, sauteed, etc. Just not with black beans. We had it yesterday with... pechay. I don't know this veggie's English name."

There. The 'archive' is Mugglenet Fan Fiction, which is up and running again after an upgrade.

I think I'll make ice candy again. I'll let you in on a secret: Mix the juice in the blender. Some scientific process I can't name and don't care about makes the ice soft and crunchy, not iceberg-y, no matter how long it stays in the freezer.

My post's title-- that song makes me guilty and mushy without fail.

"Come to Me, all of you who are tired of carrying heavy loads. For the yoke I will give you is easy and the burden is light. Come to Me, and I will give you rest..."

So few people submit to come to Him. No wonder it is such a restless place, earth.

Post-DH kootchies...

I had to get this out somehow so I can get on with my original's own kootchies.

~Dumbledore was gay. He loved Grindelwald.
~Charlie never married. Or at least, no babies. Duh.
~Bill + Fleur = Victoire, Dominique and Louis.
~Percy + audrey = Molly and Lucy
~George + angelina (Johnson, yes) = Fred and Roxanne
~Ron + Hermione = Rose and Hugo
~Ginny + Harry = James Sirius, albus Severus and Lily Luna

~Draco + astoria (Daphne Greengrass's younger sister) = Scorpius (a constellation, too)
~Neville + Hannah (abbott. the new landlady of TLC, which I don't get. She bought the pub, maybe?) = alice and Frank, I think.
~Luna + Rolf Scamander = Lorcan and Lysander (late-in-life kids. Twins. Weird how there were no twins in the Weasley grandkids)

~Harry and Dudley exchange Christmas cards and annual visits, which James, al and Lily hates.

~Ron worked with George at WWW, and then joined Harry as auror.
~Hermione worked in Dept for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures and then sat high in the Dept of Magical Law Enforcement.
~Ginny played for the Holyhead Harpies before marriage and then wrote a sports column for the DP.

~the Elder Wand's core is from the tail hair of a thestral. Fitting.

There. I think that's it. Feel free to tell me more.

In the Beta Guild, Suya asked if our love for HP is diminishing and whether we are moving on to new loves. Mine isn't and I won't. HP will always be dear to me. Sure, I'll love other books, but it's like make new friends, keep the old. It's thanks to HP that I made friends. *waves MaCofWiz flag*.

When I turn 50, my birthday bash will be HP-themed. Yeah!

Spin around like a crazy elf...